Reader Contest: Results Show

Isaac is furious with his father. Just when readership of his blog was hitting respectable numbers--just as advertising dollars started flowing in--his father had to go and have a contest, pitting his "fans" against one another. "This is not going to end well," his baby cries seemed to say.

And now I see his point: How can we at Isaac Tales pick an Honorable Mention winner for the contest when the entries are all so good? Answer: Cry not, Isaac! We will simply follow in the footsteps of the Grammys--an award show that offers so many awards that no one is left out.

So without further ado, the results of the reader constest are as follows:

For excellence in sarcastically making fun of Isaac's dad, the award goes to Shannon, with "Seriously dad? Ears?" (To be fair, Shannon, you should be directing your sarcasm at Isaac's mother, who actually bought that nifty outfit.)

For witty financial humor, and the use of phrases that will only ever have theoretical importance in our household, the award goes to Ed, with "Margin call?!? Come on, lemme into my Etrade account * * *. Margin-call my pampers!" (Ed, you should know that, right now, Isaac has more financial prowess than his pitiful parents.)

For excellence in foretelling the Rosey future, Jonathon wins, with, "If I hear one more deluded Beavers fan talk about going to the Rose Bowl, I'm going to lose my lunch." (Scoreboard: 37-33. And what about that Jeremiah Masoli knocking down defensive backs on fourth down? Clutch.)

For excellence in violence, Jamie wins with, "If my daddy wasn't holding me back, I'd be serving you a double knuckle sandwich." (This is actually the most disturbing caption to Isaac's mother in that he is looking as her in this picture. Freud, eat your heart out.)

And finally, for excellence in 80's pop culture--and the only caption to bring a multi-cultural element to the picture--Brittany wins with, "Whattch you talkin about Willis?" (As a side note, I learned the hard way several years ago that the catchy theme song from Diff'rent Strokes was written by none other than Alan Thicke. Turns out, he was a prolific theme-song writer in the 80's.)

Thank you all for your entries!